Movie Review: One for the Money

I was wary of this movie as the casting of the main characters were announced but knew I'd end up watching it. My sis and I are fans of the books and wanted to see how it would translate to the big screen. Unfortunately, it didn't hold up too well.

Katherine Heigl brings Stephanie Plum – the popular heroine of Janet Evanovich’s worldwide best-selling sixteen-book mystery series – to vibrant life in Lionsgate and Lakeshore Entertainment’s “One for the Money.”

A proud, born-and-bred Jersey girl, Stephanie Plum’s got plenty of attitude, even if she’s been out of work for the last six months and just lost her car to a debt collector. Desperate for some fast cash, Stephanie turns to her last resort: convincing her sleazy cousin to give her a job at his bail bonding company… as a recovery agent. True, she doesn’t even own a pair of handcuffs and her weapon of choice is pepper spray, but that doesn’t stop Stephanie from taking on Vinny’s biggest bail-jumper: former vice cop and murder suspect Joe Morelli – yup, the same sexy, irresistible Joe Morelli who seduced and dumped her back in high school.

Nabbing Morelli would be satisfying payback – and a hefty payday – but as Stephanie learns the ins and outs of becoming a recovery agent from Ranger, a hunky colleague who’s the best in the business, she also realizes the case against Morelli isn’t airtight. Add to the mix her meddling family, a potentially homicidal boxer, witnesses who keep dying and the problem of all those flying sparks when she finds Morelli himself… well, suddenly Stephanie’s new job isn’t nearly as easy as she thought.

The movie starts out ok with a few laughs provided by Steph's mom and Grandma Mazur around the family dinner table. We find out Steph's been unemployed for 6 months and her Grandma lets her know of a possible opening at Steph's cousin Vinnie's bailbonds office. Then it kind of slowly moves along and it seems like forever til we get another laugh. Part of the time I was distracted by Steph's frizzy hairstyle. Finally she pulls it back into a low ponytail and it was less distracting. However, Steph's overly spray-tanned chest was another matter. It kind of varied from looking like she was sweating all the time to looking sunburned. Anyway, Steph ends up working for Vinnie and takes over some cases from another bondsman who is out due to an appendectomy. One of the cases turns out to be Joe Morelli. Steph and Joe have a history - she lost her virginity to him back in high school and he never called her again. Apparently Steph then hit him with her car, breaking his leg, so they're really not on good terms at the moment. When Joe finds out Steph is the bond agent trying to bring him in, all he can do is laugh since he doesn't think she's tough enough for the job.

Enter Ranger, an experienced bounty-hunter who's looking to expand into the private security business. Book version Ranger is the ultimate man of mystery. He's Batman-Superman-Sexyman all rolled into one. In the movie, he's Extra Friendly and Helpful Man. Seriously, he meets up with Stephanie since she's new to the bounty-hunter scene and he gives her some tips about the case and guns and shooting. But he's too damn friendly and talkative and smiley and...ok I'll stop. He doesn't even manage to say, "Babe" sexily.

I really didn't think Heigl could pull off the humor of the Stephanie Plum character but in the end she did a better job than I thought. I also had doubts about the guy playing Morelli since he totally didn't fit my idea of him from the books but I felt like he and Heigl had decent enough chemistry that it worked well enough. Unfortunately, I didn't think there was much chemistry between Steph and Ranger in the movie whereas in the books, Steph would have smoke coming out her ears if Ranger even whispered, "Babe". But....to be fair, I think Ranger is so built up in the books that anyone playing him in a movie wouldn't live up to him.

I thought the movie did improve during the second half where Steph started doing some more investigative work to find the witnesses to the crime that everyone thinks Morelli committed. We also see her going out to capture other people who skipped their court date so she could make some quick money to pay her bills. Some of those secondary characters had funny moments. Then there was a weird little chunk where the movie took a more serious tone and it felt very out of place.

Anyway, while I think the 2nd half was a definite improvement over the 1st half of the movie (and what made this a C- rather than a D), I would recommend renting it or waiting for a TV airing rather than seeing it in the theater. Unless you want to go to the theater, then by all means go for it because while the movie was a C- for me, the popcorn was A+.

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Janet Evanovich - Finger Lickin' Fifteen

It's hard to believe I am still with a series 15 books in because I normally fizzle out around book 7. The Stephanie Plum series was always light and fun reading so it never bothered me how Stephanie was up to her usual antics or that she was still floating back and forth between staying with Morelli and having some fun with Ranger. There was a time when I read each book as soon as it came out but it was six months before I picked this one up. Sadly, there was good reason for that delay.

UNBUCKLE YOUR BELT AND PULL UP A CHAIR. IT'S THE SPICIEST, SAUCIEST, MOST RIB-STICKING PLUM YET.

Recipe for disaster:
Celebrity chef Stanley Chipotle comes to Trenton to participate in a barbecue cook-off and loses his head --literally.

Throw in some spice:
Bail bonds office worker Lula is witness to the crime, and the only one she’ll talk to is Trenton cop, Joe Morelli.

Pump up the heat:
Chipotle’s sponsor is offering a million dollar reward to anyone who can provide information leading to the capture of the killers.

Stir the pot:
Lula recruits bounty hunter Stephanie Plum to help her find the killers and collect the moolah.

Add a secret ingredient:
Stephanie Plum’s Grandma Mazur. Enough said.

Bring to a boil:
Stephanie Plum is working overtime tracking felons for the bonds office at night and snooping for security expert Carlos Manoso, A.K.A. Ranger, during the day. Can Stephanie hunt down two killers, a traitor, five skips, keep her grandmother out of the sauce, solve Ranger’s problems and not jump his bones?

Warning:
Habanero hot. So good you’ll want seconds.

Yeah, yeah, yeah Stephanie is out hunting a skip and the usual stuff happens like the guy getting away, cars blowing up, Ranger helping her out, Joe Morelli warning her away from him….basically a little bit from books 1-14 mixed together and repackaged with different secondary character names. The main difference of this book is that Lula is the main focus. She is a witness to a crime so has to hide out from the people looking to silence her. Where does she hide? Well at Stephanie's place of course! This arrangement doesn't work too well for either of them so Stephanie ends up staying at Ranger's place for a while.

I've listened to most of this series on audio and for some reason Lula has always been a bit annoying. It may be how the narrator voices her but I usually end up wondering how Stephanie can put up with some of her quirks. So with Lula being the focus of this book, I was rather annoyed for most of it. It just seemed like everything she or Stephanie did was the most stupid thing anyone could do when someone is looking to kill them. I won't even go into the ridiculousness of Stephanie in the hot dog suit at the end.

Another thing that bugged me was the fact that Stephanie never got it on with Ranger. While working at Range Man AND staying in Ranger's apartment, she had ample opportunity to be up in his Bvlgari goodness but she declined each and every time. The way I look at it, if she's not with Morelli why not have some fun with Ranger? Maybe that's why I'm still with the series. There's that small hope that she will have another fling with Ranger. At the same time, as much as I want that to happen, I can only see Stephanie ending up with Morelli.

Confession: I received Ms. Evanovich's latest newsletter which revealed the next book will be titled Sizzling Sixteen. Guess who will be reading it? Yes, me. Even though this book bugged me I still find them light, easy and fast reads (listens?). It won't be a "dash to the store on release day" deal, but I'll pick it up eventually.

My wish: end the Stephanie Plum series with Stephanie and Joe getting their happily ever after and spin-off Ranger to a Range Man series. My favorite book is #12 where the main focus was Ranger and finding his daughter. We could follow him in his bad ass bounty hunter/security expert exploits where he meets an equally bad ass female hunter/secret agent/uber spy and they have a Mr. and Mrs. Smith type relationship. That would be hot.

Final Grade:

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