Ripped Covers: Scandal's Bride by Stephanie Laurens

This gem used to grace the cover of one of the Cynster series Novels. prepare for a completely educational lesson on man titty and perfume marketing Reader: I don't get it, Can your chest be hot but your back be cold??? Huge glaring lack in the manjugs. Where'd the nips go? Mistress: I guess when you're in love, you have to take the time to savor the fresh fart smell Reader: Judging the looks on their faces I say they should bottle the stuff and market it as aphrodisiac aerosol. Wanderer: "Because men are animals." Musk of Love, a new and titillating fragrance by Lancome Reader: Err..I'm still on the nips. I officially cannot get past them.

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Ripped Covers - Love Me Forever by Johanna Lindsey

Happy Holidays Bookish Folks. We hope you enjoy our heavenly cover snark offering Reader: Ewww,I don't even know where to begin with this one..The rippling - ugh - muscles, his constipated face, her little-woman-ly pose..FAIL. Mistress: OMFg it's Sweet baby Jesus is all grown up.... and he's making her....?!?! My how the communion rules have changed Reader: *does the sign of the cross* Sacrilege! You cannot mean to imply that Jesus is, is, is, a ginger?! *disclaimer: no offense meant to any gingers out there but I was taught by the nuns that Christ, our savior, is a brunette. Wanderer: I think her intent is admirable. She's obviously begging him to stop the 'roids and doesn't think the big voodoo daddy muscles warrant the junk shrinkage. Big J should know by now that it's what's downstairs....er I mean inside, that counts. Disclaimer: Please note that this commentary makes no judgment on the quality of the stories the covers are associated with. Asstastic covers are almost always bad publisher judgment calls and hold little to no stock in author preference.

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Ripped Covers

This will be a brandspanking new recurring segment for us. For all of us that have been confused and appalled by redonkculous covers. We gather the truly hideous then rip into them with bitchy glee for your viewing amusement. Feel free to join in the snarkfest it’s way more cathartic than yoga. Reader: Whoa, check out those paws. That's the worst case of Beriberi I've ever seen. This romance is obviously set in a non- national healthcare country. Mistress: Oh noez. Her face is turning an odd shade of gray. He's absorbing her life force through his lotion retardant hands. All is lost. Reader: He's sucking the life force from her chin? Now there's originality. Mistress: Indeed R, Chin incubus’ are on the endangered species list. On second thought she's already dead. It's so not kool to eff the dead Chin Incubus dude. And what sick artist did you find to paint you in afterglow? He's an accessory after the fact Disclaimer: Please note that this commentary makes no judgment on the quality of the stories the covers are associated with. Asstastic covers are almost always bad publisher judgment calls and hold little to no stock in author preference.

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